It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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