Are we in a gay sports bar?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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