yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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