I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
