You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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