idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
