apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize