I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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