it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
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