so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
