Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
