I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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