is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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