There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize