just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
