Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
