I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Randomize
