His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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