my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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