Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
found the other keg... it's in the tree
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Randomize
