oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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