She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize