i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
