I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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