On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
