Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
