y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
We are all done wearing pants today
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
