Please, let me fuck your mom
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
