in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
