My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
