I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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