Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
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