...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
You left your phone here
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