Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
