North Korea, Best Korea!
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize
