I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
