We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
