so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
