"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
