I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
