I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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