Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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