even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
