I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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