Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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