Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
