Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
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