There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Small penises have feelings too.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
