And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
