my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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